Monday, December 21, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Lemon
so, it started at about 12:30a on Tuesday the 1st. I was lying in bed and suddenly woke to a gush, hey, my water broke.
It was clear so I went back to sleep. Around 5:30 I got up and called my mw. I told her my water broke, it was clear and I wasn't really contracting. we decided she'd come by after we got the boys off to school. she came and we listened to the baby.
hung out for a few hours and still hadn't gotten in a good contraction pattern. decided mw would go home and darryl and i would walk over to school to see L get an award.
that really got the contractions going, decided to lie down for awhile and try to get some rest. called mw several times in the course of all this. decided she'd wait for me to call to come back. after dinner and getting the boys to bed I called and asked her to come. I wanted to be checked and was feeling like I needed more support.
still no regular contractions, they were all over the place, I'd go from having regular, painful contractions for an hour or more, to nothing. there was some change in my cervix and the contractions started picking up so she decided to stay.
this went on for hours, I was having alot of pain, but not regular contractions. around 1am we all decided to get some sleep and see if things would pick up, or we would have to go in to the hospital. finally @4:15a I told her I wanted to go. my plan was to go, have an epi and a c/s. i didn't really verbalize this to her, but i had whispered it to darryl.
we got to the hospital, got settled in a room and started an iv. by this point i had pretty much stopped contracting. the minute i got in the hospital bed, i shut down. i could feel it, but i wasn't able to get myself back into the moment. i was tired, frustrated and scared. my mw wanted to start a little pitocin to jump start my labor. i said ok and tried to get some more rest.
once the pit started working and i could feel contractions that felt familiar (most of the previous ones felt somehow as though they were in the wrong place), i was able to relax and start talking, moving around, etc. i guess around 10a, i started to feel a lot of pain. and told her i wanted to be done, i asked to be checked and was very upset to hear i was only at4.
i was very upset and told her i wanted to be done i had nothing left. @11, my mw told me i had to get up and walk a little, if that didn't work we'd talk about options. i walked and walked for what seemed forever, but i guess was only like 20mins. by then the contractions were too painful to stay on my feet so I went back to the room and sat on the ball for a while and had a bit of a cry. once i felt what i knew was transition i had darryl help me back on the bed. i knew i had to push, but was really scared, about having a baby, not being able to get her out, everything.
i just put my hands on my belly and told the baby 'ok Lemon we have to do this now'. that was it, the first 2 pushes, I felt her turn (she had been posterior, the cause of all the agonizing back pain). I changed position and again felt hesitant, i knew it was just a matter of a few pushes, so darry said it 'ok, you can do this'. after 4 or 5 strong pushes, she was born, at 11:40a.
i can't describe the relief I felt when they put her on my chest and she was crying and rooting around and just so amazingly beautiful. i held her for a while while the cord was cut and the placenta delivered. then the nursery nurse took her and did the whole newborn assesment while i got clean sheets and stuff.
the plan was to leave the hospital friday morning, after a 24hr stay. however, since my water had been broken so long (35hours, if you're counting) they had to do a set of bloodwork on the baby. the results were ok, save one #, I forget what it was called, but it is something to do with bands of white cells. to be safe, they would redo the test in several hours. the pediatrician was unwilling to discharge the baby in the meantime. the nurses tried reassuring me (i was terrified) that he was simply being very cautious. when the test was repeated everything was fine. i had found out the night before from a nurse that normal is up to .9, and her result was 1. by the retest it had gone down to .5. when i spoke to the ped on friday morning, before the result was even back, he apologized for worrying me and did say he was just being extra cautious, both b/c of my prom, and also b/c of my history.
so, friday morning we go home and crawled in to bed.
monday we went to the ped for a check and got two thumbs up. she was 7 13 at birth, 7 3 at disharge, and 7 12 at the ped.
sorry if this is a little rambly, i'm still having a hard time digesting everything
-------------
It was clear so I went back to sleep. Around 5:30 I got up and called my mw. I told her my water broke, it was clear and I wasn't really contracting. we decided she'd come by after we got the boys off to school. she came and we listened to the baby.
hung out for a few hours and still hadn't gotten in a good contraction pattern. decided mw would go home and darryl and i would walk over to school to see L get an award.
that really got the contractions going, decided to lie down for awhile and try to get some rest. called mw several times in the course of all this. decided she'd wait for me to call to come back. after dinner and getting the boys to bed I called and asked her to come. I wanted to be checked and was feeling like I needed more support.
still no regular contractions, they were all over the place, I'd go from having regular, painful contractions for an hour or more, to nothing. there was some change in my cervix and the contractions started picking up so she decided to stay.
this went on for hours, I was having alot of pain, but not regular contractions. around 1am we all decided to get some sleep and see if things would pick up, or we would have to go in to the hospital. finally @4:15a I told her I wanted to go. my plan was to go, have an epi and a c/s. i didn't really verbalize this to her, but i had whispered it to darryl.
we got to the hospital, got settled in a room and started an iv. by this point i had pretty much stopped contracting. the minute i got in the hospital bed, i shut down. i could feel it, but i wasn't able to get myself back into the moment. i was tired, frustrated and scared. my mw wanted to start a little pitocin to jump start my labor. i said ok and tried to get some more rest.
once the pit started working and i could feel contractions that felt familiar (most of the previous ones felt somehow as though they were in the wrong place), i was able to relax and start talking, moving around, etc. i guess around 10a, i started to feel a lot of pain. and told her i wanted to be done, i asked to be checked and was very upset to hear i was only at4.
i was very upset and told her i wanted to be done i had nothing left. @11, my mw told me i had to get up and walk a little, if that didn't work we'd talk about options. i walked and walked for what seemed forever, but i guess was only like 20mins. by then the contractions were too painful to stay on my feet so I went back to the room and sat on the ball for a while and had a bit of a cry. once i felt what i knew was transition i had darryl help me back on the bed. i knew i had to push, but was really scared, about having a baby, not being able to get her out, everything.
i just put my hands on my belly and told the baby 'ok Lemon we have to do this now'. that was it, the first 2 pushes, I felt her turn (she had been posterior, the cause of all the agonizing back pain). I changed position and again felt hesitant, i knew it was just a matter of a few pushes, so darry said it 'ok, you can do this'. after 4 or 5 strong pushes, she was born, at 11:40a.
i can't describe the relief I felt when they put her on my chest and she was crying and rooting around and just so amazingly beautiful. i held her for a while while the cord was cut and the placenta delivered. then the nursery nurse took her and did the whole newborn assesment while i got clean sheets and stuff.
the plan was to leave the hospital friday morning, after a 24hr stay. however, since my water had been broken so long (35hours, if you're counting) they had to do a set of bloodwork on the baby. the results were ok, save one #, I forget what it was called, but it is something to do with bands of white cells. to be safe, they would redo the test in several hours. the pediatrician was unwilling to discharge the baby in the meantime. the nurses tried reassuring me (i was terrified) that he was simply being very cautious. when the test was repeated everything was fine. i had found out the night before from a nurse that normal is up to .9, and her result was 1. by the retest it had gone down to .5. when i spoke to the ped on friday morning, before the result was even back, he apologized for worrying me and did say he was just being extra cautious, both b/c of my prom, and also b/c of my history.
so, friday morning we go home and crawled in to bed.
monday we went to the ped for a check and got two thumbs up. she was 7 13 at birth, 7 3 at disharge, and 7 12 at the ped.
sorry if this is a little rambly, i'm still having a hard time digesting everything
-------------
Holly Jewel
12/2 11:40a
7lbs 13oz
20.5"
12/2 11:40a
7lbs 13oz
20.5"
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
yeah, I know...
my blog sucks, I suck.
whatever dude.
I've got too much in my head right now to even try and filter it out into written form.
we've done some stuff this summer, and I will try to blog on that
whatever dude.
I've got too much in my head right now to even try and filter it out into written form.
we've done some stuff this summer, and I will try to blog on that
Thursday, July 16, 2009
the big day
2pm
------------------------------
Lemon looks perfect, everything in the right place. there was one problem though, the tech could not find the penis
------------------------------
Lemon looks perfect, everything in the right place. there was one problem though, the tech could not find the penis
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
I think I'm going to try and find out the baby's gender on Thursday.I still don't want to know, but I kind of feel like I have to. I'm sure I sound like a crazy person. I really think it's a girl, but I don't know if that's me actually getting girl vibes, or jsut wishing really hard. And, I've set myself up so bad. I've been buying girly stiff. I swore I wasn't going to buy anything and here I am, and it's girl stuff.I'm actually worried about how I'll feel if I find out it's a boy. But, I'm also worried about how I'll feel if I find out it is a girl.I'm a little scared I'll be disappointed I didn't wait. But, I feel like I wish I'd known Delia was a girl b/c then I'd have gotten to have her longer, I know, that makes no sense.So, I'm not sure but think I need to know. I have an appointment with my MW tomorrow and I'm going to see if she has any input, and ask her if it's possible to give me an Rx for antidepressants so I can get it filled before the baby is born so I can start taking them right away. I've been having A LOT of mood swings and depression lately. I think I also want to start seeing her more often, the waiting is making me nervous b/c I'm not feeling much movement. I'm fairly certain I have an anterior placenta, again, b/c when I do feel nudges it's off to the side, not right in the front of my belly.Ok, that was random and whiny and long, but I needed to get it out.
and, if I do find out, I really don't feel like I want to share. I am feeling so greedy with this baby. I don't even like when people ask how I'm feeling. I want to snap it's none of your business! it's MY baby.
and, if I do find out, I really don't feel like I want to share. I am feeling so greedy with this baby. I don't even like when people ask how I'm feeling. I want to snap it's none of your business! it's MY baby.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
not much to report
took the boys fishing on the fourth. not one bite. they actually thought we were going to stay until they caught a fish! we'd probably still be there.
a couple weeks ago we took the bigger two to a minor league ball game. that whole experience sucked in epic proportions. this is a pic from before it all went down hill. the plus side is, it was a baby tooth, and the game was called so we got to exchange our tickets for another night.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Friday, June 5, 2009
name game
as you well know, to varying degrees I'm crazy.
that said, lets play a game.
I need names, boy names, girl names, middle names, first names...
but, and here's where the crazy comes in. These names must consist of five letters, and middle names must begin with J.
Now, I already know what I'm going to name Lemon whether he be a he or a she, but I still want to hear.
that said, lets play a game.
I need names, boy names, girl names, middle names, first names...
but, and here's where the crazy comes in. These names must consist of five letters, and middle names must begin with J.
Now, I already know what I'm going to name Lemon whether he be a he or a she, but I still want to hear.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
I feel guilty. I haven't missed a game yet, but I'm here and they're at the field.
The dinglepuss is soooooo sleepy and grouchy and I really hate about 95% of the parents on our team, and my belly hurts.
But, I feel guilty. I just know he's going to hit a home run, or get knocked unconscious, or something.
In other news, I felt 'Lemon' wiggle this morning. I was up around 3 b/c of a big storm that rolled through. I can't wait till I can feel him all the time.
The dinglepuss is soooooo sleepy and grouchy and I really hate about 95% of the parents on our team, and my belly hurts.
But, I feel guilty. I just know he's going to hit a home run, or get knocked unconscious, or something.
In other news, I felt 'Lemon' wiggle this morning. I was up around 3 b/c of a big storm that rolled through. I can't wait till I can feel him all the time.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
trying
One of my all time favorite songs, the one that has always been capable of stopping me in my tracks.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a7Vfh0kk8TA
it has always resonated with me.
I am envious of those with real faith, you know the kind they sit, no matter what, with that peace in their eyes that look that says 'i know something you don't and i have something you can't'
i wonder about faith is it like confidence, or skill where you can fake it and eventually trick yourself into believing?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a7Vfh0kk8TA
it has always resonated with me.
I am envious of those with real faith, you know the kind they sit, no matter what, with that peace in their eyes that look that says 'i know something you don't and i have something you can't'
i wonder about faith is it like confidence, or skill where you can fake it and eventually trick yourself into believing?
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
decent people DO exist
so, last week I ordered somethig for me from www.inspiredbyfinn.com the next day I went back and ordered something for a gift.
fast forward two days, I get an e-mail from paypal that I've been refunded from inspiredbyfinn. oh nuts! something was out of stock.....
nope, the note attached informed me, they were shipping my items together and were refunding the difference.
wow! someone on the ball enough to notice I was the same person, AND, decent enough to cut me a break.
I didn't ask, or expect a thing, but it is a nice surprise.
fast forward two days, I get an e-mail from paypal that I've been refunded from inspiredbyfinn. oh nuts! something was out of stock.....
nope, the note attached informed me, they were shipping my items together and were refunding the difference.
wow! someone on the ball enough to notice I was the same person, AND, decent enough to cut me a break.
I didn't ask, or expect a thing, but it is a nice surprise.
Friday, March 6, 2009
what a difference a year makes
last year.
2 weeks before......
..........this beautiful creature came true
at 9:20 on a thursday night
2 weeks before................this beautiful creature came true
at 9:20 on a thursday nightnow, she's gone and, I've become an aunt again......
I have 6 nephews this is my first niece.
I don't want to be an aunt, I don't want a niece who was born at (ironic) 9:30 on a thursday night, I want to be a mother to a live, warm, breathing child
Thursday, March 5, 2009
MARCH
I'll start posting what I spend, and update as the month goes on.
I'm not including what Darryl spends, but if I manage to do a good job this month, I'm going to try getting him on board for April.
3/1-- debit: $100 (took MIL to dinner) some of this 100 will appear as CASH purchases
3/3-- aldi: parmesan cheese 2.39, elbow macaroni 2# 1.69, turkey lunchmeat 2.49, skim milk gallon 2.99, cheddar 1.29, almonds 3.49, co-jack 1.29, chocolate bar 1.69, pistachios 4.49, bnb snickerdoodles 1.89, frozen breadsticks X2 2.49ea, eye cream 3.99, taco seasoning .33, dozen large eggs X3 .99
TOTAL 36.37
---- petsmart : fish tank filters 19.99, suction cups for tank heater 1.59, fish food 6.29
TOTAL 29.82
3/4-- home depot: hand mixer 16.02 cash
walmart: cheetos 1.77, toothpaste .88, powerade zero .78, ziploc containers 2.48
TOTAL 6.20 cash
TRU: weeride(child bike seat) 42.79
3/5 acme: microwave kettle corn X2 3.49ea, little debbie fruit pie .75, chow mein noodles 1.99, pasta 2.00, apple juice X3 1.88ea, granola bars X2 2.50ea, juicy juice X2 b1g1= 4.29, juice boxes 2.00, soup X4 2.00ea, skim milk gallon 3.85, yogurt 2.99, orange juice X2 3.00ea, ice cream 2.48, london broil 3.70, london broil 3.46, ground beef 6.97 ($2cpn), ground beef 6.67 ($2cpn), chicken breast 8.92, bananas 1.82, broccoli slaw 2.88, kaiser rolls 2.29,
TOTAL 84.68 + 30cash= 114.82
TOTAL SO FAR= $217.02,
I didn't include the debits in that total, or they would have been added twice
3/6 Kmart: video game 32.10cash
kmart:pajamas 5.99, cadbury mini eggs X3 7.00ttl, jelly beans 2.67
TOTAL 17.34
big lots: assorted things 17.96
NEW TOTAL= $252.32
3/8 TRU- return bike seat.
bicycle for Logan $117.68
ALDI-
Target- knee pants 14.99, windshield wf 1.69, bicycle helmet 21.99
TOTAL 40.33
3/9 BIG LOTS
Target.com- bike seat
3/11 shoprite
red potatos 1.99, green cabbage.43, ground turkey 2.63, ground turkey 2.61, corned beef 6.84, carrots 1.50.
TOTAL $16.00
target
homegoods
3/12 chika fil $6
kohls
3/13 ACME
canola oil (2x 2.99ea) 5.98
matzo (5#) 4.99
diet cola .79
fruit cocktail 1.
fruit cocktail 1.
can pears 1.
can pears 1.
pineapple slices 1.
pineapple slices 1.
cake mix 1.39
pasta 1./ea x 3= 3.00
fruit snacks x3= 2.00
raisin bran x2= 5.00
frosted flakes x2 =5.00
corn pops x2=5.00
apple jacks x2 = 5.00
nutri grain bars x2= 5.00
raisins 2.69
micro pop x6=6.00
pretzels 1.77
pretzels 1.77
pretzels 1.77
diet mt dew 1.
orange crush 1.
pom juice cockt. 2.79
buttermilk 1.99
milk 3.45
orange juice x2 =$5
assorted 8 oz cheese bricks x 9 = 9.00
whipped butter 2.49
pink lemonade conc 1.79
green beans 1.67
eggo waffles x 6= 12.00
ground beef 6.55
ground beef 5.38
bscb- 4.28
bscb- 4.08
bananas 3.31
cucumber .99
strawberries x2#- 3.99
bagged salad 1.99
grape tomato 3.00
-------coupons-----
$8.00 off $120
meat coupon $2x3= $6.00
free matzo $4.99
buy 10 keeble/kellogs- $10
buy 10 keeble/kellogs- $10
(register glitch, only had one)
three coupons for $1off cereals- $3
----coupon total $41.99!
TOTAL----- 99.80
3/16
kmart
target
I'm not including what Darryl spends, but if I manage to do a good job this month, I'm going to try getting him on board for April.
3/1-- debit: $100 (took MIL to dinner) some of this 100 will appear as CASH purchases
3/3-- aldi: parmesan cheese 2.39, elbow macaroni 2# 1.69, turkey lunchmeat 2.49, skim milk gallon 2.99, cheddar 1.29, almonds 3.49, co-jack 1.29, chocolate bar 1.69, pistachios 4.49, bnb snickerdoodles 1.89, frozen breadsticks X2 2.49ea, eye cream 3.99, taco seasoning .33, dozen large eggs X3 .99
TOTAL 36.37
---- petsmart : fish tank filters 19.99, suction cups for tank heater 1.59, fish food 6.29
TOTAL 29.82
3/4-- home depot: hand mixer 16.02 cash
walmart: cheetos 1.77, toothpaste .88, powerade zero .78, ziploc containers 2.48
TOTAL 6.20 cash
TRU: weeride(child bike seat) 42.79
3/5 acme: microwave kettle corn X2 3.49ea, little debbie fruit pie .75, chow mein noodles 1.99, pasta 2.00, apple juice X3 1.88ea, granola bars X2 2.50ea, juicy juice X2 b1g1= 4.29, juice boxes 2.00, soup X4 2.00ea, skim milk gallon 3.85, yogurt 2.99, orange juice X2 3.00ea, ice cream 2.48, london broil 3.70, london broil 3.46, ground beef 6.97 ($2cpn), ground beef 6.67 ($2cpn), chicken breast 8.92, bananas 1.82, broccoli slaw 2.88, kaiser rolls 2.29,
TOTAL 84.68 + 30cash= 114.82
TOTAL SO FAR= $217.02,
I didn't include the debits in that total, or they would have been added twice
3/6 Kmart: video game 32.10cash
kmart:pajamas 5.99, cadbury mini eggs X3 7.00ttl, jelly beans 2.67
TOTAL 17.34
big lots: assorted things 17.96
NEW TOTAL= $252.32
3/8 TRU- return bike seat.
bicycle for Logan $117.68
ALDI-
Target- knee pants 14.99, windshield wf 1.69, bicycle helmet 21.99
TOTAL 40.33
3/9 BIG LOTS
Target.com- bike seat
3/11 shoprite
red potatos 1.99, green cabbage.43, ground turkey 2.63, ground turkey 2.61, corned beef 6.84, carrots 1.50.
TOTAL $16.00
target
homegoods
3/12 chika fil $6
kohls
3/13 ACME
canola oil (2x 2.99ea) 5.98
matzo (5#) 4.99
diet cola .79
fruit cocktail 1.
fruit cocktail 1.
can pears 1.
can pears 1.
pineapple slices 1.
pineapple slices 1.
cake mix 1.39
pasta 1./ea x 3= 3.00
fruit snacks x3= 2.00
raisin bran x2= 5.00
frosted flakes x2 =5.00
corn pops x2=5.00
apple jacks x2 = 5.00
nutri grain bars x2= 5.00
raisins 2.69
micro pop x6=6.00
pretzels 1.77
pretzels 1.77
pretzels 1.77
diet mt dew 1.
orange crush 1.
pom juice cockt. 2.79
buttermilk 1.99
milk 3.45
orange juice x2 =$5
assorted 8 oz cheese bricks x 9 = 9.00
whipped butter 2.49
pink lemonade conc 1.79
green beans 1.67
eggo waffles x 6= 12.00
ground beef 6.55
ground beef 5.38
bscb- 4.28
bscb- 4.08
bananas 3.31
cucumber .99
strawberries x2#- 3.99
bagged salad 1.99
grape tomato 3.00
-------coupons-----
$8.00 off $120
meat coupon $2x3= $6.00
free matzo $4.99
buy 10 keeble/kellogs- $10
buy 10 keeble/kellogs- $10
(register glitch, only had one)
three coupons for $1off cereals- $3
----coupon total $41.99!
TOTAL----- 99.80
3/16
kmart
target
Sunday, March 1, 2009
a week's worth of spending
I had grand plans of scanning all the recipts I dutifully saved in to the pc and posting them here on my blog. My scanner has other plans, they are all way too tiny to read and I can't get my hand on the manual right now.
So, I simply added the totals and see that I've spent :::drumroll:::
$421.34
This number may be ammended since I'm waiting for MIL to pick me up and thefirst stop will be the ATM for some cash-ola.
Perhaps I'll have a flash of motivation and either figure out how to adjust the scanner, or simply type out the receipts.
This past week has been a high spending week, generally I don't think I spend quite so much in a seven day span so I have decided to keep saving all receipts (for March, or until I lose interest, whichever comes first).
So, I simply added the totals and see that I've spent :::drumroll:::
$421.34
This number may be ammended since I'm waiting for MIL to pick me up and thefirst stop will be the ATM for some cash-ola.
Perhaps I'll have a flash of motivation and either figure out how to adjust the scanner, or simply type out the receipts.
This past week has been a high spending week, generally I don't think I spend quite so much in a seven day span so I have decided to keep saving all receipts (for March, or until I lose interest, whichever comes first).
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
inspired by the tightwads
so.. we've been sharing how much we spend on food.
I decided to take it one step farther... further... farther.. well, anyway. I want to get on an all cash system so I am saving all my receipts for a month (unless I get bored sooner ;)) so I can figure a weekly average.
I'll keep you posted on how it goes. So far it's been 3 days and it's going great, LOL.
I decided to take it one step farther... further... farther.. well, anyway. I want to get on an all cash system so I am saving all my receipts for a month (unless I get bored sooner ;)) so I can figure a weekly average.
I'll keep you posted on how it goes. So far it's been 3 days and it's going great, LOL.
Friday, February 20, 2009
CRAZY--feeling sorry for me
yup, I think I'm crazy.
i cannot get a grip on myself at all
all i *really wanted to do this morning was stay in bed, Logan insisted he wanted to go to school
now i'm debating running off this weekend
i'm so angry at darryl and i really really can't deal with living here anymore. shit needs to get done, or we need to move simple as that. the fact that i asked him, no begged him not to buy this house just smacks me in the face every goddamn day i hate this house, i hate that i have to climb STILL exposed in a few places, do you know how fucking dusty it is in here...all the time
and then he looks around and asks what did i do today, fuck you ok, what did you do.
i start something and it inevitably ends as an anxiety attack then he just comes and tosses some arrogant asshole comment out, or gets all pisseda t me or gets pissed at me and the kids and says...this ones my favorite..... well if you people weren't constantly (insert common person thing to do) i'd be able to get so much more done.
it isn't worth it anymore and i really think i've reached the end of the line
he can have it all, i'll just be taking my dogs. because you know, I'm the one who wanted to have dogs, so why should he remember to let them in out of the rain, or feed them, fill water dishes.
i'm sure i could go on for days, but if people are reading they're already pissed at my lack of punctuation and paragraphs
i cannot get a grip on myself at all
all i *really wanted to do this morning was stay in bed, Logan insisted he wanted to go to school
now i'm debating running off this weekend
i'm so angry at darryl and i really really can't deal with living here anymore. shit needs to get done, or we need to move simple as that. the fact that i asked him, no begged him not to buy this house just smacks me in the face every goddamn day i hate this house, i hate that i have to climb STILL exposed in a few places, do you know how fucking dusty it is in here...all the time
and then he looks around and asks what did i do today, fuck you ok, what did you do.
i start something and it inevitably ends as an anxiety attack then he just comes and tosses some arrogant asshole comment out, or gets all pisseda t me or gets pissed at me and the kids and says...this ones my favorite..... well if you people weren't constantly (insert common person thing to do) i'd be able to get so much more done.
it isn't worth it anymore and i really think i've reached the end of the line
he can have it all, i'll just be taking my dogs. because you know, I'm the one who wanted to have dogs, so why should he remember to let them in out of the rain, or feed them, fill water dishes.
i'm sure i could go on for days, but if people are reading they're already pissed at my lack of punctuation and paragraphs
Monday, February 16, 2009
well, I went
it was just great
she loved the bag :::huge sigh of relief::: and, I *know she really did b/c her cousins and aunt at the same time all said "that is SO wendy"
so, i've done my bit as the happy aunt and will now go back to silently seething
she loved the bag :::huge sigh of relief::: and, I *know she really did b/c her cousins and aunt at the same time all said "that is SO wendy"
so, i've done my bit as the happy aunt and will now go back to silently seething
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
i made it
all loaded up with goodies.
fabric closeup.
zipper.
i will admit Darryl had to help me a tiny bit, he made the final draft of the pattern.
i made this for Wendy, the shower is Sunday (i really don't think i'm going, but had to finish this anyway)
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
why did she think...
she was fat?
I've been wandering down memory lane today... I honestly cannot believe how beautiful I was, and sooooo thin.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
a secret
I really really want to get pregnant.
i don't want to tell anyone, so i'll put it here, lol. but, i went off the prozac b/c while it's 'ok' during pregnancy it is contraindicated while breastfeeding. there's a good chance i won't want to breastfeed, but i didn't really want to make that decision before i even get pregnant
and, don't expect a big pregnancy announcement if it happens i already decided i want to keep it to myself.
but, i'm very cranky and nervous and worried and scared and excited- so that you will get to enjoy ;)
i don't want to tell anyone, so i'll put it here, lol. but, i went off the prozac b/c while it's 'ok' during pregnancy it is contraindicated while breastfeeding. there's a good chance i won't want to breastfeed, but i didn't really want to make that decision before i even get pregnant
and, don't expect a big pregnancy announcement if it happens i already decided i want to keep it to myself.
but, i'm very cranky and nervous and worried and scared and excited- so that you will get to enjoy ;)
Monday, January 19, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Thursday, January 8, 2009
life cycle of a christmas tree
so, jumping off yesterday.... I've now got 2 trees down. I took down "the tree" today. I thought it would be amusing to document it's life......
well, if I could get them in the right order it would be amusing @@
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
day 4....
Sunday I decided to see how many days in a row I could wear the same jeans.
I still haven't spilled anything on them.
<----Stinkley
totally unrelated, but freakin hysterical photo.
----1pm
dammmmmmmmn I was letting the dogs in and Stinkley wiped his paws on me!So, tomorrow I'll have to wear clean pants. bummer
Saturday, January 3, 2009
STARDATE...january 3rd 2009. j/k
Nothing on tap for today.
Stringbean is finally allowed to use the wii. He wouldn't help clean the playroom so I finally said ya know you are old enough to make a choice. Help, or don't play. He chose not to play. So after 2 days of listening to Daddy and Gigantor play, he's ready.
I had a really bizarre dream last night that I had a baby, a big fat bald baby boy. I hadn't told anyone I was pregnant so people assumed I had stolen him. strange, dream.
Stringbean is finally allowed to use the wii. He wouldn't help clean the playroom so I finally said ya know you are old enough to make a choice. Help, or don't play. He chose not to play. So after 2 days of listening to Daddy and Gigantor play, he's ready.
I had a really bizarre dream last night that I had a baby, a big fat bald baby boy. I hadn't told anyone I was pregnant so people assumed I had stolen him. strange, dream.
Friday, January 2, 2009
yeah, whatever
'08 was the worst year ever. in hopes that '09 will be better to me, I decided to start a blog. I enjoy other peoples' blogs, so thought.. hey maybe I'll enjoy my own. So, whatever dude...here goes.
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